I’m an advocate for getting naked. Especially with your truth. Last week in Barcelona, and for the second time in my life, I found myself on a nudist beach. It wasn’t intentional, but that’s where I ended up. I took this as a sign from the Universe to get naked more, both on the outside and on the inside. But let’s start with naked on the outside, shall we?

A Barcelona Beach : Playa Mar Bella

The beaches along the coast of Barcelona are as gorgeous as the people. We chose Playa Mar Bella after much deliberation and research. On the long train ride in from our AirBnb, we pictured a beautiful, soft, sandy beach with chair + umbrella rentals in front of a little beachside snack bar. Imagine our surprise as we descend the stairs to the beach to encounter is a 60-year old Spaniard with all of his goodies hanging out in the sunshine. He was rinsing off the salt of the ocean in an open-air shower. It was a pure moment of, “Oh, so this is what this is.” I nodded my head in acceptance as I scanned to my right, along the shoreline, wondering how we didn’t come across this little fact in our research. As far as the eye could see there was beautiful glistening bodies at every age, from 12 to 80.

If you’re purely an American reader, then you may be a bit taken aback by that last statement. (Or maybe you’re giggling right about now.) Please recognize that this is simply a different culture. This is just a way of being. Nudity isn’t a big deal because it doesn’t necessarily mean sex, even if there is a delicious, sensual quality to it. I, for one, think this mindset is gold.

Ladies, consider the freedom that this kind of outlook could mean for your sex life : what would it mean if nudity wasn’t this over-sexualized, commercialized, oh-em-gee-did-you-see-that thing that we make it in America? What if we saw the nature and the beauty first? Did you just feel your self-esteem level rise? Because honestly, can you feel the vibe when you take the pressure and drama OUT of the equation, and instead focus on the beauty of these bodies we’re given? So many women I know worry about sex, because they’re super concerned about getting naked in front of a man (or woman). But, my darling, did you just read that? S/he just won the freaking jackpot. Recognize the diamond that you are, my souladventure goddess.

I suppose what I’m saying is that we can learn a thing here. Stepping onto that beach was kind of freeing. It helped me let go of perfectionism and step into the grace of beauty (the men + the women + the kids). These lovelies on the beach were so chilled out in their element, so I felt that energy and rode that wave while still in bathing suit. (I was with my mom, which would have just been too weird. You’re welcome, mama.) Third time’s the charm?

That’s as much of “naked” I’m going to show you.

A Barcelona Sight : Park Güell

Barcelona is best known for the architectural triumphs of Antoni Gaudí. He completely revolutionized the industry with his innovation in Modernism. #geniustothemax More than anything I was inspired by his heart-led intention. He created slowly, using different materials and developing new techniques, to craft his vision. As Gaudí says, “My client is not in a hurry.”

Artists like Gaudí were so clearly beyond their time, and I can only imagine the accompanying struggles. As an old soul myself, there have been many times when I felt disconnected from people. But I imagine that to be so next-level artisan would mean next-level isolation despite public adoration. I have immense gratitude for the Internet, which connects me with like-hearted souls. But, Gaudí, Michaelangelo, and the like didn’t have that. It’s a wonder to me that despite the isolation, despite the fact that no one or very few “got it,” they kept getting naked with their truth for their art over and over and over again. We learned a lot about him while on this bus tour of the city, but by far, my favorite space was Park Güell. Rather than blather on about this and that, I’ll just share my three top tips. (1) Look up the entrances with escalators. (2) Book your tickets the day before on the OFFICIAL website. (3) Show up on time, because they may not let you in if you are late.

A Barcelona View : Castell Monjüic

My trip to Castell Montjüic was an accident (read : grace). I really just wanted to ride the cable car, which felt like an amusement park ride to the best view in all of Europe. Not knowing much about the castle ahead of time, I hiked up the winding hills to the base of the mountain rather than take public transport. As I rode the cable car to the top, as the city expanded below me. That wasn’t the only view my fellow tourists enjoyed; while paying the 5 euro entrance fee to the Castle in 50cent pieces (cause a girl has to lighten her load), I flashed the line of visitors as my shift dress blew up Marilyn-Monroe style. I guess I was a bit too right when I decided a shift dress would keep me cool. (I didn’t really consider the wind at the edge of the world. #kindanaked)

I strolled in and around the castle looking at cobblestones and wondering how many millions of people have trod on this spot or that. But I never expected to find an edge with a pure panoramic ocean view. To be fair though, this is usually what happens when I venture out without many expectations : I find limitless appreciation. Not unlike the Castle Sao Jorge in Lisbon, I had a pretty riveting experience of self-immersion. I was without WiFi, without a person, and even without book. I was with myself. This crazy thing happens when you let go of all the people and all the stuff : you find yourself with more to give. And somehow a castle on a hill puts me in that space. So I sat with the ocean and asked the question which has been coming up more and more often these past few months.

How can I contribute more deeply? To which I received this answer…

 Get naked with your truth.

Keep stripping your conditioning.

Keep shedding your fear. 

Look out for Pt. II Staying Alive in Barcelona for the nuts and bolts like accommodations, restaurants, transportation, etc. As always, you can subscribe to the right!

Mad love,

J

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I’m leaving again. I’m getting lost, so that I can find myself a little stronger. If you’ve been one of the lovelies for a while, then you have seen the trajectory of this last year. But, if you’re newer to the blog, let me introduce you to someone. This is me in October 2016. This is me at the start of a trip to California. It my first souladventure before souladventure was even a thing that I created.

In those three weeks I transformed as I traveled up the coast. I remembered who I used to be. I reshaped my beliefs and values. But afterward, I didn’t stop. There was the England + Portugal trip for a month in January/February. I went to the Dominican Republic for 3 weeks in April, and turned around in July for a week in New Orleans and a week in NYC. Now I’m heading to the UK, Spain, and maybe another destination for 7 weeks total. At the end of this souladventure it’ll be almost a year to the day I made this video.

I may have manifested this life of travel, but it was only by the grace of the Universe that it happened. It wasn’t just standing on those cliffs and saying those words that showed the Universe I was for legit ready to next level my life; in fact, I think that was the final piece of the puzzle for the Universe to truly believe me. All the invisible hard stuff that happened beforehand is what created a stacking effect : quitting the job, breaking the heart,  purchasing the UPW ticket, deciding to go 3 weeks early to California, being ready to spend my savings, beginning to let go of my control freak tendencies during the planning stages, starting The Ultimate Edge, packing a backpack, getting on a plane. All of THAT led me to this moment, and THEN the Universe was like, “Ok, girl. I know you’re for real now. I hear you. Get ready for the magic.”

I let go of my control freak, certainty+significance needing, uptight, overwhelmed ways. I took off the armor piece-by-piece and began to remember who I was before all the life got in the way. I started a devout practice of gratitude + growth. I entered spiritual spaces. I was present.

So, yeah. I’ve come a long way. In fact those of you who have met me in the past few months wouldn’t recognize me a year ago. But growth is a lifestyle. Honoring your purpose is a gift and a responsibility. This discovery – souladventure – THAT is my gift. So I’m going to keep doing it, so that I can show others how to have one by their own design. Because this is the kind of free that will save, heal, and awaken.

Mad love,

J

PS. If you want insider sneak peaks or tidbit tips on souladventure happenings while I am on the go (or resting up for the next one), subscribe here. #nospam #justlove



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About a month ago I was sitting in the bowels of the Prudential Center Arena. In a slanted industrial room underneath the bleachers I met my fellow volunteer crew members. We were all ready to make this Tony Robbins event the best in the history of the Universe. At our first gathering as a team, we were all gifted the same blessing, “Do what you have to do to take care of yourself first.” I smiled; though my IBS is regulated, life still happens. It gave me certainty knowing that the expectation was to prioritize my wellbeing. It also made sense. How can we give our gifts to the world without vitality? Of COURSE we need to maintain our energy.

But as the days went on I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. I leaned in to connect with others in white squeaky fold-out chairs, and found so many of them were also diagnosed with health concerns. More than most were the friends with unruly gut health. I thought of all the communities within our nation, this would be the one to have an unbeatable health standard! Tony’s teachings put health at the forefront, and this crew is the tops, so why are so many of these beautiful souls living less than 100% vitality?

let’s get resourceful

I still don’t have an answer to that question. I’m going to keep seeking answers. Every person is a unique body, mind, and soul. It does takes a while to find the perfect elixir for an individual’s health, but on the other hand, it doesn’t take very long to find out if something is working (or not). So while I may not have an individual answer for every one of these lovelies in this moment, I thought, “What CAN I do? RTFN.” My thinking process went like this…

Well, I know what healed me. There’s no guarantees it’s exactly what any of them need to a T, but I’m sure at least one part of what I do will be useful for each of them. Maybe my rituals for eating could help heal them too? How can I compress it? I think I’ll do a guide… but I want it to be actionable. How can I make it relevant to, like, today? Momentum is HUGE. They need a Quickstart. What’s the one thing I always wished I had to make it easier? A MEAL PLAN. A simple “Buy this. Prep this. Eat this.” guide. 

So that’s what I did. I wrote Eat To Live: One Woman’s Quickstart Guide to Unruly Gut Health complete with my 4 daily rituals for eating, a sample meal plan, and a sample grocery shopping // prep list. I shared a photo in our Facebook groups, and asked them to comment if they’d like to receive it. My plan was to send it through FB messenger directly. The next thing I knew, the posts blew up. Everyone wanted to use it! I quickly responded to each of these gorgeous crew members individually. It didn’t take long for Facebook to label me a spammer for messaging so many people with whom I didn’t have a “Friend” status. So they put me in Facebook jail. No more messaging for this girl. Therefore it is in fact incarceration that led me to create a way for them [and you] to get the PDF  directly into your inbox! Life really does happen for us, not to us. Drop your email below if you’d like to receive the Quickstart!




From me to you.

Mad love,

J

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Have you ever felt an undeniable chemistry that quickly becomes an addiction? Have you felt the polarities too? It’s pure light inside sultry darkness. It’s inexhaustible exhaustion. It’s a kind of breath-quickening breathlessness. Some might call this passion, but that kind of electricity… it almost feels like danger. It’s the kind of high vibration that makes your body shake. This chemistry, this connection, comes from polarity, from opposition. The forces at work here are the masculine and the feminine.

masculine and feminine energy

Every person is, at their core, either predominantly masculine or feminine. Both energies live within us on a sliding scale and we tap into them for different purposes. However, at our core, we have one that is dominant in our natural state. The mindfuck? We might not be operating from the energy that is at our core. I have a lot of feminine energy, but I used to function with predominantly masculine energy. I can tell you from experience, it’s completely draining.

masculine energy

Masculine energy is about focus and direction; it’s on a mission. It wants to meet an outcome and break free into ecstasy. It desires a challenge: to fix things, test itself, break barriers. Then, it wants to be appreciated.

Is someone coming to mind? Think of someone with a powerful centered presence. Think of someone who craves rising up to a challenge. Think of someone who is hyper focused on the outcome. Think of someone who can compartmentalize very easily. A person with a masculine core is an initiator, assertive-type with an intense desire to be respected. Basically, think about Charlie Hunnam or Gwen Stefani circa 2005.

So, what’s the drawback to this focus? Masculine energy is quick to leave and let go. It’s quick to brush aside feels and speak within words. Masculine energy is quick to ghost, because it can compartmentalize.

feminine energy

Feminine energy is about emotion and connection; it’s driven by heart. It wants to engage with others through vulnerability. I desires sensation: to be wanted, to be heard, to be grounded in nature.

Is someone coming to mind? Think of someone who could chat for hours. Think of someone who wears their heart on their sleeve. Think of someone who integrates everything : their life is seen as an alchemy that flows together. A person with a feminine core needs emotions to be tended to, and allows the masculine energy to initiate. Basically, think about Ed Sheeran or Kate Winslet.

So, what’s the drawback to this heart? Feminine energy will hang on for ages. It will stay far too long. It’s eager to hear tone and emotion rather than simply hear words for what they are. Feminine energy will allow a ghost to wreck their week, because it can’t compartmentalize.

Let’s get sexy for a moment.

Think about the actual act of (good+healthy) sex. The man is on a mission. The woman is open to receive.

To sum it up… Beyonce is feminine and Sasha Fierce is masculine.

energy within myself

old fear-based belief

I used to operate from masculine energy based on this belief : “I’m an insensitive achiever living in a man’s world.”

I was conditioned by family and friends to believe I had that insensitive quality. I was conditioned by the Western World to favor using masculine energy. I don’t know which came first, but I have always been a leader, and leadership looks a certain way, right? This is a male-dominated society, and we want to break the glass ceiling. Therefore, we have to do masculinity better than men. (Smh.)

Functioning from masculinity was the path to success. I led my life, my tribe, my relationships with fierce direction (and insanely, extensive color-coded spreadsheets). I cared less for the moments of connection, and more for tangible results. People came to me with problems, and I fixed them pragmatically with words and action steps. I was the go-getter who would solve problems; I thought this was how you showed up for people. I was a task master; I could out-plan and out-work anything at the speed of a bullet.

sensitivity felt weak

When emotional things happened, I would clam up. Being sensitive felt weak. It felt uncomfortable. I remember countless disputes and circumstances involving strong emotions. Rather than call on my feminine power and hear them… I would get super assertive, getting my point across first. This is what happens when we feel stress, we take on the mask of the opposite energy. Arguments are stressful, so I went super masculine energy past my day-to-day mask of masculinity. If you find yourself getting super emotional in the face of stress, you might have a masculine core.

the truth

I am so effing feminine. I mean, you’re here, reading my blog. You probably could have guessed it. I know I said the core energy is on a sliding scale, but I am pretty far on the femme side. Last year I freed myself from my mask of masculinity during admission of my true core on a California souladventure. I continue to peel back the layers of that mask as I practice operating either naturally from feminine energy or intentionally from masculine energy.

I’m allowing myself to be the feminine goddess that I am; this does not mean I’m not a feminist. Feminine energy is about being open, receiving graciously, and getting vulnerable. Feminism is always fierce, which I take to mean intense; however, it can be fiercely vulnerable just as easily as it can be fiercely assertive. I feel like myself when I operate from the feminine kind of ferocity that means deep love, intense connection, and pure freedom.

So much about me changed on that trip to California and when I returned home (more on that in Part II), but in a phrase… I let go. I let go of the mask and gave into my true femininity. I’ll always have gratitude for those years of operating out of my masculine, because it’s amazing to understand that power and tap in anytime I need it. I use it mainly in business and within large-group leadership roles. It also gives me the chance to really become self-aware on another level. I recognize now that when I go all masculine energy, it’s often because of stress.

Maybe you can recognize when you have this kind of energy shift too? Secret : if you’re like me, then you’ll notice it most when it comes to romantic relationships. Stop back for Part II. I’ll share what this looks like in relationships, and how we can meet the needs of our partner. (And, therefore, why I’m crumble at the knees for a masculine man.)

Mad love (and love and love and love and love),

J

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Ladies, it’s time. It’s time to stop that late night Instagram scroll using pretty girl hashtags. You know the kind : the hashtags that make us feel like shit about ourselves. (Not to be confused with the stories that make us believe, “If she can do it, then I can do it too.”) We sit, wait, and wish about the day when we’ll have that body, that look, that life. I know, because I’ve been there as recently as last week. Then I remind myself that “Pretty Girls on Instagram” aren’t actually who I want to become; they’re just the ones the world tells me I should idolize.

Consider this with me. Who is the most beautiful, magnetic, strong, courageous, authentic person you know? Seriously. Take a moment. Think of a woman who is just dynamite. Do you have her image in your beautiful mind? Good. I’m willing to bet my pitbull’s first born that you’re not visualizing a supermodel, actress, or Instagram handle with 100k followers (or at least not one who’s simply famous for being famous).

Here’s the thing. That dynamite girl – we actually DO love her for her beauty, it’s the beauty that shines from within; it’s the beauty that makes us feel something good about ourselves. She helps us see our greatness and makes us want to be better. She captivates us with simplicities that we connective to and she attracts us with complexities that illuminate some truth within ourselves. So… why the flying fuck are we (me) searching #fitspo in those last night hours?! Where focus goes, energy flows. So let’s get that focus focused on the true value deserves our attention, our thoughts, our time. Let’s focus on the dynamite girls. Boom.

You are the Wonder Woman of Your Own Life.

Consider with me a second time? What if instead of scrolling the Discover page, you spent a late night moment to visualize women around the globe “Discovering” you, the dynamite girl. Maybe it’s you a week / a month / a year from now. You are the beautiful, magnetic, strong, courageous, authentic person of your own dreams. You radiate beauty from within. You inspire others to feel something good. You help others see their greatness. You illuminate truth.

Can I tell you something? You are already her. She is already you. Everything you need is within you now.

Day by day you inch further.

Day by day you raise your standards.

Those “Pretty Girls on Instagram” are a physical destination. And you, lovely, are so much more than a physical destination. You trust and believe in the internal journey. That journey – and being on it – has created the beautiful, magnetic strong, courageous, authentic woman that you are. The world needs us to show up for ourselves, which means that we have to know that we are dynamite, and light it up. Boom.

Don’t ever let anyone dull your sparkle. – Cara Alwill Leyba

Mad love,

J

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