i fucked up today
I let a friend down. Then I let another friend down. Then I let myself down. The details are unimportant. The fact that it happened… THAT is important. The fact that I decided to move THROUGH it, not over it or under it or around it… THAT is important. Here is how it went. I’m sitting our dark kitchen table at noon, teeter tottering over the edge and staring blankly at the 1000-piece puzzle. But beyond my vacant expression was a battle. My mind is trying to focus SO intensely on the puzzle… as if somehow when I snap another piece into place I’ll consider myself productive. No. Bullshit. I’m avoiding the pain — the pain that comes with the recognition of BULLSHIT. That my actions in how I treated my friends were BULLSHIT. That this avoidance of dealing is BULLSHIT. Have you ever felt like that? It’s like there are loud knocks at the door…
View Post